In Why We Keep Chasing Approval ? Break Free from Validation, we explored how childhood conditioning shapes our need for validation and how to reclaim our self-worth. Now, These quick 3 reflections will help you shift your mindset, let go of perfectionism, and focus on what truly matters in life. Let’s dive in!
The “Grandparent Test” for Perfectionism
Next time you’re spiraling over a tiny mistake, try this:
Imagine you’re 85 years old, sitting in a rocking chair, telling your grandkids about your life.
Are you going to say,
❌ “I really wish I had triple-checked that email in 2024…”
❌ “My life would have been perfect if only I’d responded to that text faster…”
Or are you going to say,
✔ “I had the best time traveling, laughing, making memories, and doing weird little hobbies just because I loved them.”
At the end of your life, what’s the story you want to tell?
✔ Focus on those moments, not the ones spent worrying about being “enough.”
The point? Most of the things we stress about don’t matter in the long run. So go easy on yourself—you’re doing just fine.
The “Best Friend Rule” for Self-Talk
Ever notice how we talk to ourselves way worse than we’d ever talk to a friend?
Imagine your best friend said, “Ugh, I feel like such a failure.” Would you say:
❌ “Yeah, you’re right. You’re terrible.”
Of course not! You’d probably say something like,
✔ “That’s not true ! You’re doing amazing, and one bad day doesn’t define you.”
So why don’t we say that to ourselves?
Next time you’re being harsh on yourself, try this: Pause and ask, “What would I say if a friend felt this way?” Then say that—but to yourself. You deserve kindness too.
The Childhood Dream Check
If your younger self met you today, would they be excited about the life you’re living?
✔ If yes, amazing!
❌ If not, maybe it’s time to bring back some of that childhood wonder.
Conclusion:
At the end of the day, most of the things we stress over—tiny mistakes, unanswered messages or calls, or seeking approval—won’t matter in the long run. What will matter are the moments when you truly lived: laughing with loved ones, chasing your passions, and embracing life without the weight of perfectionism.
So the next time you’re caught in self-doubt, remember the Best Friend Rule and the Grandparent Test.Treat yourself with the same kindness and perspective you’d offer to someone you love.
Go easy on yourself. You’re doing just fine.
If you want to know about the Power of Silence and its help in Personal growth, Read here in this blog post: Become Quiet to Listen: Unlock the Power of Silence